Women With Big Hearts Suffer the Most-The Truth

breaking your own heart

Those with big hearts suffer the most is a meme that I see floating around on social media almost daily.  Posted almost as if it’s some badge of honor.  I can bet the one that post these sorts of quotes has just had their heart broken or been let down and disappointed yet again.

Big heart and suffer to me don’t even belong in the same sentence.  A big heart is limitless in the love it has to give and able to receive.

If I were one to be offended, I would take such quotes to mean I am heartless as I  experience very little suffering when it comes to affairs of the heart.

The suffering happens when you give your heart with the expectation that the gesture will be returned.

The suffering happens when you expect others to love in the same way as you do or in the same amounts in every situation.

Suffering happens when you abandon yourself and put the needs of others before self.

Ever spoken the words “I have nothing left to give” or “I give up.” Our emotions and feelings are our clues.  If you feel you have nothing to give, it is a sign you haven’t given enough to yourself.

As you probably have heard Katarina say many times you can’t pour from an empty cup.

The late Wayne Dyer says “You can’t give away what you don’t have.”  It’s one of his 10 secrets to inner peace and success.  Look them up if you haven’t heard them.

If your big heart if full of pain then pain is what you have to give away.  If that big heart has anger in it, then anger is what you have to give.

Pain, anger, frustration, judgement, resentment are negative emotions that omit negative energies.

Does having a big heart simply mean you have more room for these negative emotions alongside the love? Big rooms can fit in more stuff right? I wouldn’t think this is what you desire for your big heart.

It’s Not That Your Heart is too Big

If you keep getting hurt over and over it’s not that your heart is too big.  It’s more likely your boundaries are too small.

You put your happiness and well being into the hands of others as opposed to taking responsibility for it yourself. You hand your power over to others.

Nobody has control over us. We are just painfully addicted to giving our power away.

Kyle Cease

Do you give and give to others and feel you get little in return?  If this is you then you are giving from an empty cup a mentioned above.

Do you label yourself as one who loves hard and strong and turn around and blame your heart aches on this self proclaimed label?

A big heart or rather full heart means giving without expectations.  Often it is not your heart that is broken.

Nobody has ever broken your heart. The broke your expectations

Kyle Cease

If you relate to any of the below, it’s not your heart that is the problem.  It’s your self abandonment and lack of self care.

  • Find it difficult to say no
  • Put the needs of others before your own
  • Often feel used or taken for granted
  • Defending your actions often
  • Feel guilty when you do things or even buy things for yourself
  • Worry about what others may think of you
  • Dwelling or obsessing over who done you wrong
  • Find yourself in the savior role
  • Difficulty in receiving

If you think your suffering is due to your big heart may I suggest that maybe your heart isn’t quite big enough to include the love for yourself.

You are breaking your own heart.

It is not selfish to put yourself first.  It is self responsible.  When you take your happiness and well being into your own hands, your heart becomes full, not big.

There is a difference in a full heart and a big heart.

One is simply beautiful, the other lies in victimhood.

You are Breaking Your Own Heart

More times than not, we broke our own heart.  While we speak the words that he broke our heart or ripped it out of our chest, that is your story you tell yourself and others.

Someone else did this to you when the truth usually lies with the choices that you yourself made or expectations you placed on another human.

The truth of the matter is these choices and expectations are often what led to your broken heart.

Choices and expectations like below:

You choose to stay with a man who has made it clear he doesn’t want a relationship.  You hold on hoping he will change his mind or that you can get into his heart.

You keep checking the social media of a man who has exited your life and torture yourself with his new found seeming happiness.

You choose to over look his bad behaviors and red flags.

You choose to jump in way too fast.

You choose to see only his potential as opposed to the contrary evidence exhibited by his current behavior.

You choose to attach to a man who is not attaching to you.

You expect him to meet your needs or show up in the way that you deem as acceptable and proper.  He has his own needs to meet as well.

Most expectations comes from an attachment to a particular outcome and that outcome is something out of your control. Despite this fact, you attach anyway as opposed to opening your heart to what can naturally unfold, even if it may lead to heartache.

When you get your heart broke and talk the “he did me wrong” talk, you are making it all about you and how you were victimized.

The truth here is it’s not about you.  He too has choices.  He chooses what he feels is best for him and instead of playing the blame game, honoring those choices is the emotionally intelligent thing to do.

Have you ever broken someone’s heart?  Did you want to hurt them?  I doubt it.  It wasn’t about them, it was about you and your choice at that moment. It has nothing to do with your own self worth.

I have broken a few hearts and not always in the kindest most graceful way.  That was my choice at the time.  I learned that trying to soften the blow only led the man to hold on longer to hope that wasn’t there.

My perception was I was doing them a favor.  Their perception was I was cold and heartless.  Then their story became one of a heart that is big gets hurt too much.

Drop your story of the pain, heartache and loss that was done to you and examine your choices and expectations down that road.

Growth is ahead and this is when the caterpillar can become the butterfly.  Don’t stay stuck as a caterpillar.

Pain Has Nothing to do with Your Big Heart

We all experience heart ache.  People leave, people die, people disappoint.  It’s a natural part of life.  No one is immune to this.  No one has the corner on this market.

It happens to all of us. More than once.

I can recall my heart being broken, twice in a span of a couple of years.  The first time I remember very well sitting on my front steps of my little house crying, screaming I would never allow myself to love like that again.

I had a pity party that lasted for months. I closed my heart.

But I did love again and heartbreak happened yet again.  This time was different.  While it was worse, and my heart felt broken wide open, something shifted.

Though I cried in that second heart break, I didn’t remain at my own pity party.  I found an online forum and channeled my pain back into other women who were feeling broken as well.

One thread started there ended up with over 30,000 comments and stories and a hundreds of women helping other women shift as well.  The love I gave and received there broke my heart wide open in a wonderful way.

If you were one of those women there, thank you.

A broken heart is an open heart but that choice is yours.  Your biggest growth spurts and lessons come from the breaking of your heart.

In every heart break is the opportunity for great expansion.

Love really is an unlimited resource.  There are no limits on the amount of love it can hold.

No one can chain or unchain your own heart but you.

MORE: Meet Katarina in Bali November 6-9 To Remove the Barriers that Stops Him From Falling So Deeply In Love With You

Have you heard of Katarina’s Fan Subscriptions? Sign up today and you can listen to a total of 24 hours worth of listening including the class on When In Relationship Exclusive and What to Do When You’re Exclusive with A Guy Who Doesn’t Act Like A Boyfriend (so far, number will keep adding week to week so eventually you will be able to have access to hundreds of hours of teachings) and attend next weekly classes LIVE. This unlimited access to Katarina Phang’s Library of Discourses will surely increase your emotional intelligence in dating, relationship and dealing with men and life issues in general from the one and only Man Whisperer/the Last Resort.  Only $99/month and you can cancel ANYTIME (but surely you won’t want to do it cause there is NO equivalence of  dating or relationship programs out there with the same QUALITY, ILLUMINATION and AFFORDABILITY as this one).

Thanks to your enthusiastic and undying loyalty and support Facebook has picked Katarina’s page to have the privilege of Fan Subscriptions. This perk isn’t given to just any coach or page.  Anyone has to meet certain stringent standards for that.  Katarina was picked because she is leading the industry with her very educational and enlightening content that continues to gain tons of tractions and audience.  And Facebook can’t find a better partner in crime than her in the niche to make people stay on their platform for as long as possible.

This is the answer to her dreams to reach 1 billion people with her healing message and when you support her work you not only support yourself -and get instant benefits out of her soothing classes which are cheaper and work way faster than any therapy- you also support humanity and a whole because her mission is to heal the planet, one woman at a time.

Here’s list of topics of Satsang you can watch upon signing up (over 24 hours!!!!):

1. Attachment and How It Messes Up Everything, 60 mins

2. How Emotional Abuse Happens In Relationship and How to Stop It, 90 mins

3. When To Speak Up and How To Communicate In A Way that He Can Listen to and Make Him Love You Even More, 90 mins

4. Financial Sharing in Dating and Relationship, the Ideal and Reality of it, 60 mins

5. Trusting Yourself and Your Intuition, 80 mins

6. Abandonment, Fears, Anxiety and A Journey to True Inner Healing, 80 mins

7. What Is Cheating and How Cheating Happens and how to cheat-proof your relationship, 80 mins

8. Abandonment, Fears, Anxiety and A Journey to True Inner Healing part 2 with coach Dasha, 90 mins

9. How to Cultivate Emotional Attraction with Your EUM/Guy, 90 mins

10. Goddess Interview: Chiemeri, The Power of Thoughts, 60 mins

11. How to Create Magnetic Allure Thru Sex and Sensuality with coach Dasha, 140 mins!!

12. When Is Relationship Exclusive and What to Do When You’re An Exclusive with A Guy Who Doesn’t Act Like a Boyfriend, 90 mins

13. How to Create Magnetic Allure Thru Sex and Sensuality part 2 with coach Dasha, 80 mins!!

14. Seven Moves to Charm, Entice and Captivate your Man without Leaning Forward, 140 mins!!

15. How to Move On after a Breakup, And Attract Him Back in The Process If That’s What You Want, 100 mins

16. How to Lean Back and Be High Value Even When You Feel He’s Friend Zoning You, 60 mins

And here are the upcoming classes every Wednesday, Saturday or Sunday at 3 or or 6 pm EST (we’re still adjusting the timing to adjust to best time that most can attend):

17. How to Create and Build Solid Trust in a Relationship with Coach Dasha, August 21

18. Goddess Interview: Laura, How She Heals Her Anxiety and Depression and Lost 168 lbs with Journey Inward, August 28

Only $99/month and you can cancel anytime. No down payment of $2,000 and $500/month some vanity/newbies coaches with no credentials twist your arm to pay. It’s like therapy with a Buddha for less than $10/hour. There is simply NO EQUIVALENCE out there in terms of QUALITY, RESULTS and AFFORDABILITY. It’s so DIRT CHEAP, ladies…seriously sign up!!

Bring your own topic for next months. I promise you, you will be as chilled as a cucumber being in the commune of Goddesses and mentored by the Awakened Goddess par extraordinaire and whichever guy or guys who find you attractive will melt in your divine presence because you’re simply a unicorn. All these men will go gaga on you and eat out the palm of your hand.

It goes without saying, Katarina’s fan subscriptions will help you a great deal with whatever issue you have in your relationship or life and you get to support her work so she can help more women. We’re on the path of building a commune that will create an alternative society in which inner freedom is the state of being.

Only $99 per month you’ll get the wealth of information that works 100% of the time from the one and only Man Whisperer and the Last Resort:

Katarina Phang’s Fan Subscriptions

You want to learn more of this sacred knowledge that will bring you more understanding of men, love, relationship and in the process more peace of mind?  There are a few options you can do (pick two or all of them):

1. Sign up for my newsletter, and you will receive three first chapters of my ground-breaking ebook and a free class on how to overcome your anxiety and triggers without pushing him away.

2. Add yourself to one of my fabulous FB support groups: Katarina Phang’s High Value Goddess Community.  My groups aren’t moderated and it’s what sets them apart, believe it or not!  Transformation happens gradually or fast (depending on where you are in your journey) because you are forced to see your own reflection in every member that stirs a strong emotional reaction in you.  The groups make you AWARE and AWAKE, that’s the entire purpose of my teachings.  It can’t be done when you are being coddled in a fake environment of safety (you don’t get that in the real world out there either but you will learn to cope as a healthy and well-adjusted adult).  Any wonder I’m the one coach with the most results out there?  It’s thanks to this, among other things.

3. Download my Apps: Android and/or IPhone and you can access all the free and paid contents from there.

4. Subscribe to this blog on the upper right hand corner of this page.

5. Follow me on FB and like my page, so you will know when I have FREE classes with juicy content and teachings on FB live videos.  I give away so much free content because I know the impact I have on humanity as a whole.

6. Subscribe to my youtube channel.  I’ll eventually add all my free classes/videos there.

7. Sign up for my magnificent Feminine Magnetism Group Coaching consisting of 27 weeks (approximately 54 hours of learning), particularly Module 1 Journey Inward and Module 5 Salvation Through Relationship.  You will accelerate your growth with this one-of-kind profound program not being offered anywhere else. Begin the journey toward equanimity and self-acceptance.

Frolic with Kat in her hot tub overlooking her stunningly picturesque back yard

8. Come to my celestial home for the upcoming retreat.  We’ll have at least twice a year/retreats.  If you like to listen to my speeches, you’ll be even more blown-away to sit with me in my living room (the Zen room) overlooking the celestial infinity pool in an intimate setting while I’m delivering my teachings.  You’ll come home with a new more empowered perspective on love, men, relationship and life in general. I can shift you energetically like no other and usher you to the gate of a new dimension of reality.

Please share this article if it resonates with you.

Want to learn more the ins and outs of inspiring the man you adore to commit to you THE MOST DEFINITE WAY?  Here’s the most affordable way: by working with me face to face in a very relaxed, fun and intimate setting in my own home!  And you will get some of the coaching programs I mention here as bonuses as well so you can start listening to them before coming to the weekend getaway.  I promise you it’ll be one of the most worthwhile investments you’ll ever make in your life and you will leave knowing exactly how to be a high value woman.  Your life will turn upside down for the better after the retreat if you practice all the skills I teach there.






One comment

  • If you keep getting hurt over and over it’s not that your heart is too big. It’s more likely your boundaries are too small.
    Spot on!
    Thanks for writing such a nice article!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *