The Perils Of Mixing My Relationship Advice With Others

There are tons of half-baked dating advice out there.  Be careful whose advice you’re following.  And when you mix good advice and half-baked advice that doesn’t consider your contribution to the problem, you’ll get the results of the bad advice, not the good one.  

Vivi wrote in the group:  “After 6 months of dating Guy #1 … had to walk because he couldn’t commit. Hardest thing ever but also most personal growth ever. Everything was great with us, I really liked him, he really liked me, let him lead, texted and called daily, pretty sure exclusive since we spent so much time together and always had a great time together BUT he just couldn’t commit. I told him I wanted a BF and after 6 months I had reached my threshold. He said he couldn’t do that still getting over divorce. He’s over her but not over failure of marriage.

Day 2 of NC and it SUCKS!!  His Match profile is back up. That burns! ?

It’s also hard to focus on rotation because I miss him. I feel I really leaned back and went with the flow but then just was turned off that he couldn’t commit.

Onward and upward is not always easy!”

Upon further investigation by the ladies, she admitted he was actually leading and investing and she was enjoying their blooming courtship but she read some dating coach’s advice about the 6-month timeline that triggered her anxiety.

What to do with a Guy who won’t Commit!

Then BAM…she dumped a boiling frog.  Brilliant.  Two days later he was back on Match.

As the saying goes: don’t throw the frog out with the bathwater, especially when he’s simmering quite nicely enjoying the warm weather.

This poisonous advice about timeline you are following isn’t helping a man who is actually beginning to fall for you.  Before doing anything drastic with a guy, listen to this class please: Seven Conditions Of How Men Fall In love.

What kind of commitment do you expect at a 6-month mark that cannot wait?  And why are you in a rush that you have to disrupt the chase?  Especially when he’s initiating, investing and courting, what else do you want?  The title?  Many women have the titles without the relationship and they come to me in droves.

Don’t get ahead of yourself.  It’s six months, not six years.

Of course he’s turned off that his efforts haven’t been appreciated and instead you’re telling him what he’s been doing isn’t good enough for you.  What an ungrateful person you are!  Now you don’t have that no more, you want it back!!

She’s now wanting to apologize and go back to where they were.  Sigh.

It’s not that bad after all in the grand scheme of things and in the context of a 6-month period, is it?

Giving an Ultimatum is Bad Dating Advice

Listen, empty ultimatums are stupid.  Issue an ultimatum only when you know you can stick by it, not because you expect a reaction that will benefit you.  And with my method you don’t even have to say a word if you are still rotating and things don’t work anymore for you.  You will just pull back and he will either step up or step out.

When it’s time to walk away you will know it.  Don’t attempt to walk away just to get a reaction till you’re 100% sure or you’ll be thrown into this dramatic mess.

But this guy has done nothing wrong.  That is what makes my heart sink even more.  Women are just so insecure and controlling it’s incredulous.

You can’t talk a guy into coming closer to you, let alone committing.  That is what emasculating is and he’s surely turned on by it…NOT!

A guy doesn’t commit just because you ask for a title, or you say “hey, time is up.”  That’s hardly feminine nor luring with honey.  He commits cause he can’t think of anybody else who fits the bill as a partner better than you do. This is the one thing even the so-called relationship experts don’t understand and they shouldn’t coach till they get this because they’re going to mess up otherwise healthy blooming relationships.

And why lead with confrontation?  A sure way to get a guy fade on you is when you are out of your feminine essence.  A guy wouldn’t fight with you cause it’s denigrating for him to do so.  And it’s sending him a clear smoke signal of what he can expect down the road.  Not pretty.

Beta guys, on the other hand, will follow and succumb to your every whim.  They will listen to every discussion you bring up.  This pushy controlling advice that you are implementing will land you the beta dude that you adore.  If that works for you, more power to you.  But most of you want a man who is more masculine than yourself and you can only have him if you are more feminine than him.  You won’t endear him by chasing him and bringing the talk is chasing!

Any coach who gives you dating advice to bring the talk isn’t the one who will lead to your relationship success.  I talk to these women who do this every single day and only when they implement the love jiujitsu that I teach things begin to turn around.  One of them is Natalya who is now one of my 48 engagements in 2016.  She said: “I screwed up a couple good potential relationships after divorce, because I followed this “dating coach” advice “If a man didn’t commit in 6 months, he never will.”  Wrong!  Every man takes their own time to commit.”

These so-called “dating experts” don’t understand human psychology cause their vantage point isn’t 360 degree.  Their advice is so one-sided discounting altogether your contribution to the problem. Their advice is as generic as if you ask your girlfriends. They will immediately jump into labeling and attacking the guys.

The reason I become so successful (and I am not apologizing for it) is because I zero in the source of the problem in the first place: you, your issues and your lack of knowledge what works with men.

So stick to what I teach. My ebook tells you exacly what to do/not to do. Try that first.

And don’t lead with fear.  Fear is one of the lowest frequencies that will bring about what you fear.  It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.  You sabotage a blooming relationship thanks to that.

Trust in the process.  The journey is as important as the destination.  Cherish the journey.  Savor it.  He’s not going anywhere if you keep luring with honey and creating beautiful memories together.  Lead with the heart, not the mind.  Much relationship advice out there is mind stuff.   It’s about how things should be instead of dealing with “what is” and working around it.   Pretty shallow, hence it doesn’t work.

And try this at home as well: when it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!  Sit with your anxiety till it dissipates like watching muddy water settle down and get clear again.  It’s the same with any emotion, when you don’t stir it further it will settle.  Don’t be a slave to your emotions.

Learn more about stuff that truly works from my monthly membership audio that isn’t gimmick that is backed up by super solid track record that will help you in every aspect of life, not just romance.   You can pick any 5 previous classes for $370 ($50-100 off) or if you get 7 classes you get to pick one Goddess Interview Series consisting of 4 classes (value at $209).  Write me at if you are interested in this deal.

You can’t fail with my method.  Not possible.  It’s 2 + 2 = 4.

MORE: Better Than The Talk Is This Thing!

Have you read my book yet?  If not grab it here because you will learn so much about a lot of things that haven’t worked for you in your love life and how to fix them.  I have just added a new bonus teleclass you don’t want to miss: “How Feminine Magnetism Is The Solution to Every Relationship Problem You Have.”


  • I am (ViVi) the one who wrote this on your FB group. It’s been 3 months now since I ended it and have regretted it every single day. Biggest mistake. Still miss him.

  • I bought your eBook and it has open my eyes and help connect the puzzle to why I was failing with men. Ever since, I’ve worked really hard on changing my thinking habits, expectations and overall being less reactive. I have never felt more “chill” in my life. Can’t think of a better word to describe it but it sure beats anxiety. Anyways, thank you so much for what you do.

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