How to be a Irresistible Woman and Melt A Man’s Heart

how to be an irresistible woman

How to be a Irresistible Woman using my Counter-intuitive Ways


So…another goddess has been born. Another Woman has discovered how to be a irresistible woman. Gina signed up for both my previous cycles of Leaning Back workshop (we’ll start Cycle 3 February 9). She is now among my star students who just get it (read her Holiday Blues story here). Her Emotionally Unavailable Man just claimed her a few weeks ago. Attracting men and keeping them attracted are just now so effortless thanks to her newly gained insight.

Her post in the group touches two issues I want to address here: 1) why softening boundaries is the most counterintuitive thing that I teach and how to be a irresistible woman responsible in creating the aura of irresistibly in my clients, and 2) why men need to give in relationship to feel like a man.


“I’ve really loved how Katarina always urges us to soften our “boundaries.” I used to only see my guy once a week or so, and I couldn’t get him to invite me on one of his out-of-town trips to save my life. Communicating my desire for both didn’t help the situation. Once I let go of the desire for both and shifted my energy toward other people and activities that made me happy, he really stepped up. Now our dates last three days and he plans romantic get-away weekends down to every little detail. Try letting go of your expectations and the universe will bring you unexpected gifts.

I think it’s miraculous. His complete turn around is why I call Katarina a genius. Do less and receive more, it’s truly amazing. I have also made it a point to compliment him on his masculinity: strength, handsomeness, sexiness. “Can you please lift my 5-gallon water container onto the dispenser…you are so strong! Thank you, you are the best.” I’m a triathlete, I could lift my water myself, but why miss the opportunity to make him feel great for making my life easier?!”  ~Gina, Los Angeles

First, what is the softening of boundaries?

I talk about it at length in my Journey Inward program but as a quick summary softening of boundaries pertains to the sense of oneness with everything else in the universe.  The more spiritually evolved we are, the more we feel connected to everyone else.  Boundaries, by definition, separate and with those walls we build around ourselves we often recoil in this constricted sense of self that traps us in our suffering.  Boundaries don’t invite love to get in and out of your life freely so it grows by leaps and bounds nourishing our soul.  The more boundaries we erect the more readily we perceive slights to the integrity of our self.

Those with very rigid boundaries come across as jaded and hardly feminine, let alone irresistible..  By definition, femininity is about softness.  When you are hardened, you are blocking your feminine radiance from shining through.  If you are perpetually single -and not happy-, this may be one of the main reasons.

A lot of people falsely believe that by erecting boundaries they protect themselves from hurt.  The opposite is what actually happens.  Boundaries which are motivated by fear motivate an anticipation of problems and energy flows where attention goes.  You see problems everywhere, so problems arise.  That’s how powerful our mind is.

Boundaries also spring from expectations, more often than not.  And the reinforcement of them springs from reactiveness. These boundaries won’t get you closer to what you want.  It’s throwing the baby with the bathwater. This is not how to be a irresistible woman to men.

Having said that, of course each one of us must have healthy boundaries.  What are healthy boundaries?  Those are your deal-breakers, the boundaries that have been tested and are implemented after rigorous inner work so you know for sure what you will put up with and what you won’t.

If you understand the nature of man, you will be irresistible to men.

The nature of the masculine is giving and doing.  For a man, when he’s in the position of giving and accomplishing something he feels his male power.  And the opposite is true too; i.e. when a man is conditioned to receive in relationship, it is slowly and surely emasculating to him whether or not either realizes it. It is very damaging (and I’ve come to the conclusion since I was in this role for over 16 years).

A man who is in the receiving role in relationship will feel overpowered and feminized by what his limbic system perceives every day.  It depolarizes the relationship and it makes him lose all the motivations to be a man in relationship and that’s when he starts taking his woman for granted. It’s all unconscious, albeit. 

Now I am taking the conscious decision to be in the feminine role of receiving in relationship and this is the core of my teaching and the results in my own and my clients’ lives have been AMAZING.

A man has this incessant thirst for making his woman happy and he thrives on the rewards (gratitude and appreciation) she showers him with.  He feels like a man and thrives on it and the more he will shine in his masculine while at the same time the deeper you bask in your feminine. Being in your feminine is how to be an irresistible woman.

You see how this works in a feedback loop?

So when you want your guy to shower you with love and affection, the most effective of doing it by being a joyful and grateful feminine woman.  Being reactive, jaded, and “expressive of your upset feelings” (in the name of “boundaries” as per above) because you focus on his shortcomings unfortunately only create resistance in him.

So does it mean you shouldn’t give at all?  Of course not.  The best way is to give without expecting anything in return and it makes you happy in itself.  But always beware when you over give (more than he does)…because the next minute that can be the reason of your relationship’s demise.

When a man feels understood and accepted, he will be more than happy giving you everything you want.  That’s the essence of luring with honey and what makes you a irresistible woman..

Whatever your situation is my programs can make it better as long as you are committed to changing yourself to be comfortable in your feminine role.

When you change to become more feminine, your man can’t NOT notice and change himself accordingly. I promise you, I have seen this play out time and again in my and my client’s lives. This is why my method works so fast.

This is sexual polarity in action.

In light of that, you don’t want to miss this one-of-a-kind workshop. Three weeks of very affordable coaching that will change your perspective on men and relationship forever the way it changed Gina’s.

And the new program Four Components Of Melting His Heart will take you on the path toward lifelong bonding with your man.

UPDATE:  I wrote this over a year ago. Today she wrote me with an update: “Hi Katarina, I just wanted to say hello and thank you for everything that you’ve done for me. It’s been a while since I’ve participated in your private FB group, but it was as staple for me up until a year ago. As of a year ago, my EUM stepped up big time and decided to get on board with my dream of becoming a mom. We moved in together and got pregnant three months later. Life has been a whirlwind since then and we just moved again to make more space for baby (who is due in a month) and family who will help us raise our baby. You always said you had faith that he would step up, and you were right.

I tell all my friends about you, your dating philosophies, and your classes. I am very happy with my love and family life. I couldn’t have done it without you.

Much love,

Get Gina’s interview here in which she revealed how the turn of tide took place.  You don’t want to miss the lesson.  You can also learn from other Goddesses I have given birth to in the Goddess Interview Series.


MORE:  Spice Up Your Stagnant Relationship With A Certain Kind Of Drama That Makes Him Yearn For You

Have you read my book yet?  If not grab it here because you will learn so much about a lot of things that haven’t worked for you in your love life and how to fix them.  And sign up for my upcoming new cycles of Journey Inward and Leaning Back workshop.

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Image credit Deposit Photo!


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