The Beauty of Leaning Back in a Relationship -Real Examples
Leaning back in a relationship, whether it’s brand new or a well established long term or marriage is about releasing control of the outcome. Many try to make it more complicated than that, but it’s basically just that simple.
Many in Katarina’s group that haven’t been through her helpful coaching groups can’t seem to grasp this. They want specific information like it’s some sort of rules to leaning back in a relationship. How long should I wait to answer his texts? How many texts can I initiate and not be seen as leaning forward?
Leaning back is about taking care of yourself first. It’s not investing more into him than he is into you. It’s about not having expectations of where things are headed. It’s about not trying to control him in any way. Leaning back is like surrendering. Leaning back is about mirroring a man and his level of investment.
For those that want more specifics about what leaning back behavior is or is not, this article is for you. I will give you specific examples of what is and what is not considered leaning back in a relationship so he will perceive you as high value and easy to lose (without which a man can’t commit to you).
10 Ways That You May be Leaning Forward with a Man!
- You haven’t heard from him in days, maybe weeks so you decide to send him a text.
- You have tickets to an fun event so you decide to invite him to come along.
- You go to his social media and like his posts and pics.
- You ask when will you see him again
- You ask him why hasn’t he called
- He mentions getting together over the weekend. It’s lunchtime Friday and you haven’t heard a word, so you text to ask him if you are still on.
- He asks you out for a specific night but doesn’t set the time or place. The day of the date you text him and ask him when and where.
- You surprise him with lunch or a gift
- You offer to do things for him around his house, like laundry, dishes.
- You show up where he is at, uninvited
All of the above are leaning forward in a relationship or with a man. They are all signs of you trying to control an outcome. Control doesn’t go over well with men at all. All of the above are anxious behaviors that cause men to pull away.
All of the above are also you operating from your masculine energy. When you are in your masculine energy a man doesn’t feel safe. It’s your feminine energy that causes a man to soften, warm to you and let down his guard.
10 Examples of Leaning Back in a Relationships with a Man!
- You never text a man that isn’t texting you.
- You have tickets to go to a fun event! Great! You call up your girlfriend and ask her.
- He is on social media? You didn’t notice
- He hasn’t made plans to see you again? Oh well, you have a rotation going so you will have dates.
- He hasn’t called? You barely noticed your life is so full
- It’s already Friday and he hasn’t confirmed your plans. Too bad. You made other plans yesterday.
- He didn’t set the time or place? You already assumed he wasn’t serious and have another date set up.
- You don’t give him gifts, you give yourself gifts, like a day at the spa.
- You lean back and allow him to do things for you at his house. Pour your wine, fix you a drink, prepare dinner. You graciously accept and acknowledge his efforts.
- You never just show up on a guy. What he is doing is none of your business.
When you lean back in a relationship, dating, or exclusive, you detach from the outcome. If he doesn’t follow through on something, you stop giving him a top spot in your life, you downgrade him. No drama, no anxiety or despair, you just keep it moving.
The drama comes when you nag or pressure him about certain behaviors. Men see this as you trying to change them and they start to feel they can’t make you happy. Men want to make you happy and if they feel they can’t, they go find someone that they can easily make happy. A woman in sync with her feminine energy.
If you find leaning back and letting go of controls, you need to take Katarina’s Leaning Back and Cultivating Feminine Mystique workshop. Seriously, if you get anxious when things don’t go the way you want or find yourself hurt over it, you need this workshop to get yourself grounded.
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photo credit depositphoto