Is He Stringing You Along? Or Do You Allow Yourself To Be Strung Along?

is he stringing you along

Is he stringing you along? Do you not feel like a priority in his life?  Are you constantly trying to think of ways to get his attention.  The fact is, a man can’t string you along unless you allow him to do so.  Your choice is simple.  Accept or reject his “less than” behavior.

Hello from Turkey!  I’m on a trip to Turkey and Greece but I want to share something with you.

Many of the women who come to me resist me on rotation dating with various reasons like “it’s just not me,” or “it’s not in my culture,” or “I can be busy with other things without dating other men,” or “I feel guilty and it just makes me feel worse and it makes me miss my emotionally unavailable man(EUM) even more/reminds me even more why I want my EUM.”  Or other reasons which, bottom line to me, are LAME. Then they ask me is he stringing me along?  Big sigh…

Is he stringing you along?  No, not really.  You are stringing yourself along by not keeping your options open.  A woman with options or a dating rotation can’t be strung along because she doesn’t focus all of her energy on just one man or hold hopes for just one outcome.

If you feel like a man is stringing you along, you are in essence, admitting you have surrendered all of you power.  You do have options.  You can say no or reject this behavior, you don’t have to be available at his command.  If you are dating others, this will begin to come naturally.

Some women do very well with the leaning back but the refusal to de-focus and spread their psychic energy caused them to relapse and get all reactive all over again.  That’s what happens when you resist me.

Here is my client Danielle’s post in the support group (get my ebook to be included in this awesome group): “Lately there’s been a lot of rotation talk – what it does and the power thereof.  If you have a rotation, you won’t be asking is he stringing me along.  You don’t have time to worry about it.

I’ve been here about 18 months and I just finally started a rotation. I always SAID I had a rotation, and I thought I technically did, but let me tell you, there’s a big difference between having men interested in you that you talk to while you hang on to the hopes of one man claiming you vs. actually getting off your ass and being feminine and going on multiple dates so you learn how to be social, how to be sweet, and how to learn to let men treat you well.

The corollary is that you learn to treat THEM well, appreciate them for what they bring into your life, and don’t have any expectations of the outcome.

I can’t believe I never dated this way.  It has lightened my energy and helped me be a lot more grateful for the moment as well as what all different men bring to our worlds, and how much abundance is truly out there. I have a third date tonight and I keep forgetting about it, honestly. There’s no anxiety.

I am a CLASSIC piner. Trust me, I have spent YEARS hoping/wishing/fantasizing/ dreaming that some EUM would suddenly see my worth and sweep me off my feet. But it doesn’t work like that. I was always addicted to the delusion and illusion … so much safer.

I’m not out of the woods yet, and this is no story of triumph, yet.  I’m still working through the moony delusional tendency to future-trip and picture all the EUMs lining up at my door, saying how wrong they were to ever leave me.  In the meantime, however, there are actual real nice men that like taking me out and do nice things for me.

I am learning to focus on them while doing inner work like crazy.  Little by slowly I think I’m breaking this addiction to pining.  The key is to not let up.

The rotation does wonders for your self-esteem and is excellent practice/training ground. We get so hung up on these EUMS but really, there’s a whole world of guys out there that want to take us out … and do you really, really, really WANT that EUM?

Or do you want to live life? Do you want to eat nice dinners and have flowers bought for you while you learn to be gracious and appreciative, or do you want blowjobs on the run while he has an hour to spare?

There is nothing wrong with giving blowjobs if that’s what you want to do, mind you. But I have the distinct feeling that most of us here want more than that and on some deep inner level know that we’re worth it, or we wouldn’t be here.

Once my energy and expectations changed a whole deluge of guys showed up that want to take me out, and they’re fun, and I don’t see myself walking into the sunset with any of them but who cares? It’s teaching me what I want and what kind of treatment I like and don’t like.

My point is that it is imperative to get off your ass and really actively work on a rotation instead of just having a potential rotation. We all want better relationships and love and I’m glad I finally figured out the missing piece.

I am starting to genuinely not care what happens because most of my moments are spectacular, and I’m learning to relax into it. It is awesome to figure this out at 42.

Stop pining and let men take you out and be nice to you, and you be nice back to them, and even if you’re thinking about the EUM the whole time it will start to fade as your karma and vibration builds and you continue the inner work.”

The reason my ex married me was because of rotation, plain and simple.  Without it I would have been a mess and a nag.  My energy would have been sour.  But I’m a natural rotation gal cause my self-love is strong (even back then when I wasn’t a man whisperer like I am today). I have never wondered: is he stringing me along?

And he rotated me, he was seeing his ex for the last time to confirm that he had lost all feelings for her.  That while telling me he loved me and kept me on the side just in case.

You see guys will do whatever it takes to be sure you’re the one.

Believe me, men rotate you whenever they feel like it and whenever it’s clear that they’re not committed to you, like my ex.  What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.  So, if he’s not a bf (and you’ll know though his actions, rotate his ass please!)

No man can string you along unless you offer yourself to be strung along by constantly leaning forward.  And that is why you are in this predicament in the first place because you are a fixer.

Do not fix.  Accept or reject.  Be easily turned off.  Be easy to lose.

If you practice my method unrequited love is an IMPOSSIBILITY.  Katarina’s Ladies only respond to pursuit instead of pursuing.  No pursuit no “situasionship.”

It is exactly why you need to date, cause you’re pining.  Pining and unrequited love comes from lack of options.

Dating is about spreading your psychic energy so you never have to pine for any guy.  That’s one thing that wastes your time and energy the most and has to be avoided at all costs.  Guys aren’t into piners.  Guys are into women who are easy to lose.

Do you think Kate Middleton would have got her prince back had she sat on her ass pining for him? No, she let herself be wooed by different high-profile men. It ignited William’s desire to get her back cause now he sniffed competition.

Guys love competition. Check class #6 on how to be high value and easy to lose here. It will fire you up like no other.

Guys communicate through actions or lack thereof.  Piners and fixers love to talk about why they’re feeling upset and why their guys aren’t measuring up (yet they stay “faithful”).

Talking to a guy about what doesn’t work for you gets you into the fixing mode.  That is pre-Kat and rarely ever works. With my method your mystery remains intact and that’s why he’s intrigued by how different you are to a-dime-in-a-dozen kinda women out there.

Ready to be blown away once and for all why rotation will raise your Goddess vibration so you will never resist me again on this very important aspect of my method?  Listen what I have to say here.

Is He Stringing You Along?  Another testimonial from my client Sandra!

“So I was seeing Colombian FWB/ex boyfriend exclusively by arrangement (his request).  We even went to Hawaii together and he had invited me to go with him to the States to meet his mother and brother. But he had said he didn’t want a relationship with anyone because his focus is working and saving (he spends 3 months a year in Colombia visiting his son and family).

Things felt good, his actions are so great, calls every day, visits often, treats me like a GF, organizes my car service, visited me when I was sick… we were definitely not just FWB.

But I got to the point where I didn’t want to be exclusive with someone who had said he didn’t want to commit. So I told him that I wanted to be free to date others. He said he couldn’t stop me and in an ideal world we wouldn’t be having this conversation but he can’t offer me what I want (a relationship), I said I don’t care about the label as long as it feels good, is respectful and fun.

He said ok but that this means he is free as well and “don’t be asking me about who this girl is or who that girl is”… I was like yeah no problem and told him that I’m back on POF and am dating again.

He was really surprised and said he wasn’t online. Guess he knew then that I wasn’t playing. And I think that was key, I wasn’t doing it to make him jealous, I was seriously not going to invest anymore in this guy, happy to see him and sleep with him as long as it feels good, but I’m also going to be going out and spending time with men who want a relationship for real.

So then I went out on a date with a lovely man, we had been on a date 6 months ago, he’s tall good looking, fun, HOT. He had messaged me a few times since the first date, and I had always replied, leaning back, I never initiated and never asked to see him again, and he didn’t ask me out either.

Anyway when I got back on POF recently he messaged me and asked me out. We had a great time… 3 hours, laughed till we cried. He walked me to my car afterwards and said “Do me a favour and get the hell off that site, you don’t need to be on there”. I just took it as a compliment and thought yes how convenient for you if I took my profile down! Have heard from him a bit since then, he’s called and texted but no third date just yet.

I also think he’s used to being chased, he’s ridiculously good looking, successful, tall – so he would have a lot of options. He added me on FB and the comments on his pics from women is amusing… Just straight out leaning forward. So not a lot of movement there but I’m not concerned, if he likes being chased and wants to be chased then I’m not the one for him.

Have also met a guy from POF who lives in my building. He’s a bit keen, and it’s hard living right here because he is trying to see me every day. Texts me good morning, goodnight, always asking to see me but hasn’t taken me out.

Feels like it’s too easy for him to be lazy because we live so close it’s easy to pop in and say hello without an actual date… Anyway he’s lovely and tall and fit and funny. We picked up dinner last night and ate at my place. He’s very sweet but I’m feeling a bit smothered.

But the funny thing is that in the last few weeks, the FWB has been making little comments about me dating other people. A couple of weeks ago I was sick with the flu and he came over to deliver pharmaceuticals to me and he joked that I was sick because I’m dating other people. He jokes about needing to detain me while he works so I can’t go out on dates. Calls me Rapunzel and that he needs to lock me up in the castle.

I haven’t really said anything more to him about my dating since I told him I’m back on POF, I’m not going to rub it in his face or be immature about it. I’m genuinely just doing my own thing and focusing on the fact that my future and my happiness are the most important thing.

So energetically there’s been a shift. Sometimes I’m not available to see him but I just tell him I’ve got dinner tonight or something without saying it’s a date – I let him wonder what I’m doing.

One day he came over to my place 3 times while I was working from home (morning noon and night).  He’s definitely trying to claim my time and dominate my space so that there’s no room for anyone else.

He has told me that I have everything from him, and that there are no other women (so much for him telling me not to ask him about this girl and that girl)… Last week he said he really hopes I don’t meet anyone else while he’s away and that over the next 3 months he will just have to keep reminding me how good things are between us so that I don’t commit to anyone else.

This morning he told me he is a “Sandra addict”… BUT he’s not locking it down and I’m kind of glad anyway because I don’t want to be locked down with someone who’s going away for 3 months just so that he knows I’m not dating anyone while he’s away.

I’ve been with Kat for about 6 months and never really got the rotation thing right, I was always over invested in one guy or another so wouldn’t want to go on dates. But I’ve really learned a tough lesson from last year where I gave exclusivity to a man who didn’t even ask for it, and I waited for him because he made all the promises in the world.

I now value myself so much more and so having a rotation comes easily and it flows… I’m really happy and enjoying myself and not thinking too much about any of them. It’s also really enjoyable receiving the attention and efforts from these men without DOING anything and without thinking about them. But also if I never hear from any of them again I know I’ll be just fine.” He certainly isn’t able to string me along ever!

Rotation will shift your energy, eventually.  It might be hard in the beginning cause changing a lifetime habit sometimes takes more than a few days/weeks.  And energy is everything.

My method is wildly successful cause this energy thing.  And it’s not being taught anywhere else.  So stop resisting me for a change.  Just do it and see it for yourself how it works. Never wonder again is he stringing you along.

Want to learn the step-by-step guide on how to get him to commit to you?  Sign up for Cycle 3 of Four Components Of Melting His Heart.  You will also learn from a few of the 50 ladies who got engaged in 2015 on week 5.

And of course if you hesitate to read my book, please start there right now!  It’s going to be the best investment you’ll ever make as far as your love life is concerned.  You get to work closely with me and that is a privilege cause you won’t find this offer anywhere else and my time is getting more and more limited thanks to my Midas Touch. 

So get it here:

He’s Really That Into You, He’s Just Not Ready

You will get 2 week email coaching from me and 20 min Skype session or 2 week email coaching only if you so choose!  These prices will continue to increase because naturally I no longer can accommodate everyone who comes to me for coaching.   And for someone my caliber the prices are extremely reasonable for the results I deliver day in day out without fail that makes me the most successful relationship coach in the world.

MORE: Feeling Strung Along Is A Sign Of Over Investment, Here’s How To Manage Your Emotional Investment So No Guy Will Ever String You Along

Please share this with the buttons below and if you want FREE advice please ask me questions on the comment section below since I no longer have time to respond to every personal email I get these days unless you’re a client or reader of my book (and don’t forget to subscribe to this blog for more insight into the mind of men on the right side bar so you’ll get notified for each new post).

And if you want to learn more of this amazing way to put your man under your spell and the self-knowledge that will bring you more peace of mind, there are a few options you can do if you want to know how to be an irresistible women.  (pick two or all of them):

1. Sign up for my newsletter, and you will receive three first chapters of my ground-breaking ebook and a free class on how to overcome your anxiety and triggers without pushing him away.

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  • I found this so relatable to me.. You are seriously a better counseller.. You are an inspiration I swear.. Its been 2 years I am trying to leave him but eventually I can’t.. He’s literally fuckin another chicks in front of me still… What do i do.. I want to get out of but apparently I don’t want to fall in love again and get hurt..

  • I’m very interested in learning more

  • So I am reading this and truth is I need help. I have never been told I am bad woman or girlfriend. Actually, all my family members and friends even co-workers love me and know I would do whatever I can for them. I am a very calm and happy person. My ex-boyfriends always told me I was great and
    that the reason we didn’t work out was their fault, and they always try to come back and be with me. BUT I got into a relationship and he’s, from what I gathered from my research, full of toxic masculinity. It’s just too much. I am naturally a free spirit when it comes to relationships. You treat me good I’ll treat you good etc etc. He reminds of what one of your posts says about herself. He wants to know my every move. If I’m on my phone for 2 minutes too long, who are you texting, what are you guys talking about, why are you smiling? Or why do you have to visit your family so much, you travel too much. I truly have tried to understand and work with him but it’s crazy. Before he and I were official I talked to a couple guys. I would text but nothing sexual just crap. Wellllll, He didn’t like that. He made me erase all guys I was ever in contact with unless they were family, but only blood relatives. I can’t salsa dance with anyone (it’s my go-to cardio). What I’m saying is that I’m fine with leadership, masculinity but this seems wrong. Very very wrong. I try to be calm when we argue but I do get loud because he is wrong. Am I in a bad relationship or do I need to be more feminine? He is always telling me I’m not sweet or calming and that I am too masculine. I agree that when I am mad I get loud, (I’m latina) but i just get passionate I’m not trying to emasculate him. I also don’t like being yelled at for something he does as well. I try to point it out and his go-to response it. I can do what I want, you don’t question me or tell when and how to do things. I tell you, you do it. That’s that. — This is ok right? I’m confused reading all these blogs. Am I not playing my role right? or is he really mean and insecure etc etc and I should run?

    Please help me!

  • Hi Katrina

    I love your book, and I’m trying to get used to the idea of a rotation. I’m just confused by what you say in regards to one thing. I am rotating but not having sex. I personally feel too attached after sex so I am just going on “dates” movies, dinner etc. and get to know men always as a friend. The problem is you speak of having no expectations but I don’t want FWB or casual sex situationship. I left my EUM 4 weeks ago because of this.

    How do I convey to any man not just my EUM that “casual sex makes me unhappy and if that’s all you are interested in I cannot date you, thanks but no thanks” do I lean so far back that I compromise what makes me happy? I don’t want to do that. What would be a way of wiggling out of the sex issue so a man knows I’m attracted and interested but am focused only on someone with loving intentions? Do I just be blunt and come out and say it? 🙂

    • Hi, my answer to this will be unconventional because I don’t buy common wisdom out there. If you want to succeed in relationship you gotta explore your resistance on sex. I can help you work through it. Labeling it casual sex and give an absolute meaning to it always keeps you in a bind of a limiting belief and concept. Start with my ebook and sign up for my other programs especially Journey Inward.

    • If you are ready attracted You gotta give him your sexuality without sex. You can do things besides sex and stop before you feel it’s too Much. Tell him you rally want to but in your experience you get too attached&it just didn’t work to have sex too soon without really knowing him in a proper relationship

  • At the end of the day, most of the time, we allow them to string us along. If he is not giving it 100% every day and isn’t doing whatever it takes to keep you happy, toss him.

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