22. How To Let Go And Why Letting Go Is So Hard To Do

Please write me at kat@katarinaphang.com if you want to pay with PayPal or different methods.  I will send you an invoice.

Many of you are so entangled in your attachment to a lukewarm or uninterested man it makes your situation much more complicated that it actually is had you been not clinging so hard….

To understand letting go, first you have to understand struggle. Letting go only exists when there is a struggle. What is a struggle and why do we struggle?

Struggling is a human trait. Only human beings struggle. Animals unless in the time of survival (like when they are hunted by their predators) don’t. At least they don’t emotionally cause they don’t have a self.

To struggle requires a psychological self. Only very advanced animals like human beings have psychological selves. And this very statement brings about the intuitive feel that psychological selves are a bunch of poo poo, does it not? They’re totally made up.

Where are they made up in? In your head.

So to struggle requires evolution. It requires complexity. The brain evolves to allow us better means at survival: more technologies, more amenities, more comfort, more productivity etc. Yet with the evolution of the brain, it comes with a hefty price: the ability and propensity to struggle because the brain is prone to conceptualize and attach to its own conceptualization. And these two…and nothing else…cause us to struggle.

When you are one with the rhythm of life, you stop expecting anything coming from life cause you will just observe, notice and recognize. So you allow life to unfold the way it’s supposed to unfold without your striving and efforts to make it otherwise. So instead of expecting life to fit an idea that you have of what life is (should be) you jump into life with a curiosity of a 5 year old. Bring it on! Let me see what the day has in store for me.

So letting go is the absence of striving for letting go.

“What a wonderful class!  I just listened to it.

 I hadn’t thought of the concept of expectations as “struggling” and of it being a societal thought process. I now see it in the dating realm. One guy recently told me that I had not reached egolessness yet.  I didn’t care.

He couldn’t believe that I wouldn’t “bite” at his challenge.  But it wasn’t my challenge, so I just continued doing what I was doing.  I watched his mind jump around like a monkey, trying to bring drama to the situation.  I just didn’t respond.

Finally, he said that it was “a great conversation.”  I realized it was a conversation with himself.  I was calm and peaceful.  Thanks Kat for pointing this out today.  It seems like I’ve made progress.” ~Nancy, New York

“Good class!  And a good reminder. I’ve been letting my mind rule me.  Thoughts that are not reality just silly stories.  Thanks, Kat.  

I was thinking that when I was a teenager my mom wasn’t strong enough to handle me.  She admits this.  I had become angry and rebellious.  Looking back now I see I just wish I had a strong woman to show me and guide me and not run from my anger which I see now was fear.  

I’ve been afraid all my life. You can handle me and be honest yet you have been kind and I really appreciate you coming into my life.  Thank you, Katarina Phang” ~Renee, Vancouver


“The class was excellent!!! And I don’t get a commission. Lol!” ~Layla, Florida 


You can purchase this powerful class for $107 (Mind you my hourly coaching is $499/hr today and it will keep going up!):