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Why Is He Pulling Away And How To Keep Him Interested


As part of intimacy cycle most guys will need to “regroup” after a period of intimacy (say after your weekend getaway). This is also called the rubber band effect. When a rubber band is stretched, and if the other end stays put, at some point the end that is being stretched will have to bounce back to its original position. So in other words, when your guy is pulling away, as long as you don’t chase and try to cling on to him, he will bounce back to you re-energized. Many women though, out of fear and ignorance, do the very thing that disturbs the bouncing-back process. Now instead of bouncing back, these men are running away from them.

“Hi Katarina,

Thank you again for emailing the book to me; I’m not sure what happened or why I could no longer access it.  I do enjoy reading it and have done so several times.  What you say is true and I do believe in your method, although maybe too late for the one I am or have been pining for lol…which I’m sure you would say, Read it again dummy you don’t get it!  when reading that.

My story is that I met what I thought was an amazing guy and actually thought he could be the one…scary thoughts for me but I just bought everything that he was saying and believed him right away.  We were intimate pretty early on and things were moving fast but I really thought, Ok this is how it goes!  When you meet someone and you know, this is how it is.   Read more »


Is He Losing Interest? Check On Your Expectations


A woman who is strong in her self-confidence as a feminine woman holds the key to a successful relationship in which she is cherished and treated the way she wants to be treated by the man she loves.  And that simply comes from a realization that she is powerful by being soft, secure in her self-worth, operating from a place of WHOLENESS without expectations and being firm in her healthy boundaries and self-respect.  She doesn’t ask for a lot, yet she doesn’t settle for a guy who doesn’t step up either. She treats herself -and her partner- well and she won’t tolerate lousy behaviors from any man.

My private group which is a support group for my clients and book readers is stirring with controversy every now and then (get my ebook to be included in this GEM group in which you will learn and grow so much). One of the members wrote not long ago, “As I was hiding my boyfriend’s birthday present under the bed, I stumbled on a shoebox containing old cards to and from his ex. I shouldn’t have read them cause now I feel like my heart is breaking…I know the cards are old, but it still hurts. Should I bring this up to him or was I in the wrong for reading them?”

Here’s my response:

I would say this is a case of “curiosity kills the cat” and how women are masters of creating problems when there is NONE. Read more »

How To Get Out The Friend Zone With Benefits Fast!


You’re friendzoned because you feel masculine to him. Getting out the friend zone is not a matter of what to do but what NOT to do.  Fixing things is masculine energy and a lot of women are in a constant fixing-mode that gets them deeper in a hole.  Let things be.  Let him be.

I have written three times about Arida but since her journey and love story is so inspiring I can’t help picking her case up again as a case in point that you have all the power to turn your relationship around.  In her case: from being friendzoned to being committed to:

“Be 100% responsible in our relationships. It takes only one person to make changes, and that person is us. We cannot control other people and situations. We can only change ourselves – either by walking away from things that no longer serve us (in this case, unfulfilling relationship) or adapt ourselves to that person/situation. No more victim mentality.

Oh, Katarina, I would no longer use the term EUM anymore for my guy…LOL.  Other than he needs to settle his personal matters first, he is emotionally available and so loving! All I can say is the frog is definitely boiled!  I wish I could hug you, Kat! Read more »


How To Be A Feminine Goddess Who Is The Co-Creator Of An Enlightened Relationship


“I was a total mess just a few weeks ago! Every day I listen to one of Katarina’s classes. I have Journey Inward and the Leaning Back workshop.  I just keep re- listening, I read her book and now I’m reading “The Power Of Now.” I’ve actually been able to go down to half the amount of medication I take for anxiety with no side effects. This is unbelievable to me! When I joined I was suicidal, planning how I could do it so it would look like an accident. I plan to get off them totally, been on and off 8 years and didn’t help much and only made me gain weight.” ~Rinna, British Columbia

My free teleclass was a blast on Saturday and surely you are itching for the replay, right?  This replay will only be available for a limited time and after that you can only access it through the members page and will be a part of my ebook’s bonuses.

So what are you waiting for?  If you haven’t got my ebook yet, it’s about time to make a commitment to yourself to start turning your life around, in every way, not only romantically, because YOU’RE WORTH IT.  Get it here.

If you sign up to my newsletter, you will receive the first three chapters PLUS you’ll be in the loop for our next FREE teleclass and access of the replays as well.

Read more »


Why Won’t He Marry Me Already?


Not everyone needs to marry and by God, please let marriage be a by-product of a healthy relationship, not a destination. If your relationship is shaky now or not that connected stop thinking of marriage for a while. Dive in the relationship, live it to the fullest, commit to it, be vulnerable, work with your partner to heal each other. That’s what relationship is for. You should stay together till it no longer serves the growth purpose for either/both of you. And stop deceiving yourself that you can walk away from relationship when you’re not done. Be brave, stay and work it out.


I received many emails asking me this kind of question from Jennifer: “I’ve been in a relationship with a man for almost 3 years. We’d talked about moving in together and getting married.  He acts like a father to my daughter, stays at my home 24×7, does most of the cooking for us, looks after my daughter when I have to work evenings and is completely devoted to us.

To backtrack: he told me a long time ago that he didn’t believe in marriage.  After dating for over a year I decided it was a deal breaker for me. He wasn’t happy about this but decided that ultimately I was more important that getting married or not getting married and if this was what he needed to do to be with me and my daughter he would do it. Read more »


Salvation Through Relationship: Relationship As A Spiritual Practice


“It is not easy to live with an enlightened person, or rather it is so easy that the ego finds it extremely threatening.  Remember that the ego needs problems, conflict, and “enemies” to strengthen the sense of separateness on which its identity depends. The unenlightened partner’s mind will be deeply frustrated because its fixed positions are not resisted, which means they will become shaky and weak, and there is even the “danger” that they may collapse altogether, resulting in loss of self. The pain-body is demanding feedback and not getting it. The need for argument, drama, and conflict is not being met.” ~Eckhart Tolle

This is the second part of my awakening story.  You can read the first part here.

During my awakening I also saw glimpses of what relationship could be like when at least one partner changes him/herself: from being reactive to being non-reactive, from taking things personally to allowing your partner to work through his/her fear, from resisting to getting into the flow and being totally vulnerable, from separation to sacred union as the yin-yang symbol depicts.

In a nutshell, from relationship filled with strife to harmony, healing and…salvation. Read more »


A Journey Home To Self, A Story of Awakening


Awakening is available to all because it’s a mere RETURN to our essence.  And that is why it is called “awakening” or “realization.”  It’s not something so grand, it is in fact very ordinary.  But we can’t see it because we are too busy in our delusion that is self-created through ignorance.  We have been lied to by and lost in the dream and we forgot we were sleeping.  When you have awakened, you will never go back to that dream.  And if you do, you know you are dreaming.  You will no longer be lost in the content of the dream and you will remember you are just playing a role that isn’t really you.

The past month I have been floating on Cloud 9 (hence updating this blog hasn’t been a priority).  There has been a profound shift of consciousness in me which I would call awakening.

I have been teaching my inner work program Journey Inward for a year now and I didn’t know what it would lead me to when I first launched it.  I just saw the repeated patterns of unconscious behaviors in my clients and the women who were in my community which kept them from being their most alluring self and in the process attracting and keeping a man attracted in a functional relationship. Read more »


How Do You Know If A Man Has Claimed You?


At some point the inevitable question will arise: are we exclusive?  Many will say not every guy subscribes to the “verbal claiming” philosophy and I would agree.  However, a guy who claims us will be so obvious with his actions and he won’t leave us in the dark.  He makes it clear that he’s courting us.  Claiming, more than anything, is really an energy.  Actions, at the end of the day, speak louder than words

Anabelle asked this question:  “Is it considered “the talk” if you ask a guy if he’d be upset that you’re dating other men? I am in a very gray area with firefighter. It’s been over 3 months. He volunteered that he’s not online, he’s not pursuing anyone because he wants to focus on me, he took me out of town and we had a wonderful time, he wants to introduce me to his family who are asking to meet me, he makes plans in advance, he spends a couple nights a week at my house, he calls me “babe” and makes me feel beautiful, cooks me dinner, fixes things around my house and brings me little gifts **BUT** he hasn’t said, “you’re my woman” or “I don’t want you dating anyone else,” or “I’m falling in love with you,” etc. etc. Read more »


When Your Boyfriend Wants To Go Back To His Ex, Hold The Door Wide Open


When your man thinks he’s not over his ex, let him go….hold the door wide open.  Usher and help him to complete his journey faster.  And trust the strength of your connection and the rare special of a woman you are will bring him back into your arms eventually…that if some lucky guy hasn’t swept you off your feet that is!  My teaching is a path of no resistance.  I call it Love Jiujitsu in the highest form. It works like magic cause it’s a path of all saints.


Marina came to me last year after the guy she was dating for four months decided that he wanted to go back to his High School sweetheart.  They had a relationship over 20 years ago and somehow the flame was still burning in him.  He wasn’t done with her.

She was broken hearted, of course, so she signed up for my private coaching and three cycles of both Journey Inward and Leaning Back workshop as well as the new program Four Components Of Melting His Heart.

Throughout their breakup he regularly checked in on her through emails.  He loved to write (long) emails, often to her irritation and bewilderment, talking about all and sundry: his health, her health, her pets, the air purifier she should be getting, etc…everything but about his real feelings for her and why he wrote her so much. Read more »


Why The Alpha Female Finds It Hard To Have A Lasting And Peaceful Relationship


If you are an alpha female with beta traits, your relationship with your alpha partner will sooner or later run its course thanks to lack of polarity that will be exacerbated over time.  If you keep facing the same issues from one relationship to the next, it’s time to change yourself or… settle with a beta male who matches your energy better.  Not every woman is cut out to be with an alpha male.  Some of them will be much happier with a beta male if changing proves to be difficult for them.

Chrissy whom I wrote about a couple of blog posts ago updated me with this:  “Katarina, what would I ever have done without you! My relationship with C is probably the easiest, most relaxed, no-conflict one I’ve ever been in. I just go day by day, keeping feminine and open and he responds every day with making changes to keep me happy all on his own. I don’t have to say a thing when I’m upset, I don’t nag. I never realized being with someone could be this easy and that I could feel so loved and wanted without begging to get it. Thank you.

About 3 months ago I was nagging him to change his status on FB. Why? Such a stupid thing to want. Who cares? So the last month or so I realized it doesn’t matter what’s on FB. I know what we have and I trust him to know what we have. Well this week, guess who changed his status on FB. Once I didn’t care anymore and removed the expectation, it happened. Plus, why waste time being upset about something that’s really just nonsense. Read more »

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