web analytics

The Difference Between The Rules And My Method


The Rules are about how to secure an outcome by applying a set of strict strategies.  When you are all about outcomes, your energy is heavy and manipulative.  And yes you come across aloof and uninterested in genuine connection.  You just are interested in a goal which is to make him submit to your whim.  Some guys will go for that…yep the backbone-less beta variety you have no interest in, not the guys you are attracted to.  Not the guys who have options cause they will scratch you off right of the bat.

Cherry shared in the group:   “Long post, but I’ve decided to share my story, because I want women on here to know that Kat’s philosophy really does work and can transform your dating life. 

My story: 2 years ago I moved from vegas to Austin, 23 yrs old. I’d never had a serious bf (and was still a virgin) mainly because I just couldn’t get guys to want me long term. I was the Queen of chasing and convincing. 

I moved into a house with two guys, renting a room in their house. LONG story short, me and one of my roommates, I’ll call him M, ended up being very attracted to each other. I fell so hard for him. I liked him SO much. Eventually I lost my virginity to him. 

Afterwards, I got very emotionally anxious, attached, needy, possessive, clingy, etc.  Read more »


The Missing Piece Of The Puzzle Of All This Relationship Advice Is Inner Work


Meeting Kat online was the best thing that happened to me as for the first time I understood the part I was playing in destroying good relationships. I was guarded as I bought her book as I had sworn that I would no longer buy any more books cause none of them works and read it (couldn’t put it down by the way) then the grand aha! moment happened.  It all finally made sense, that I was literally creating my experiences, I found myself, my past, my triggers and my present, including the ugly truths that led me to difficult relationships. I did not want to accept who I had become, I couldn’t believe how simple everything is.  I’ve been with my man almost two years, for one year, it was really just a mess but early last year when I really understood Kat’s lessons, my relationship blossomed into the most beautiful experience in my life.” ~Emma, Nairobi-Kenya


“I have had a long history of seemingly perfect relationships with Alpha men and have never quite had a problem attracting men. But for some reason, my relationships never led to a firm commitment and had often been shrouded in anger, mistrust, control and two broken engagements later, I finally realized something was not right.

I also met my current man around that time. As I watched the tone of the relationship mirror what I was used to, it suddenly hit me it was a same “skirt” different “trousers” situation.  No way was history going to repeat itself as I owned up to my part of an erratic story.

I think for me the biggies are 1) dealing with an alpha-alpha who is also an avoidant attacher 2) being a Florence nightingale and how I won my power back by snapping into reality 3) the power of completely letting go.

Read more »


If You Want Success With Men, This Is What You Should Not Do


There is something very transformative and calming about being humble and receptive.  You are so used to in the go-getting, leading role you find it a torture to just sit back and let somebody else show you the way.  I can’t show you the way unless you shut up.  If you want to the leading role, get your own coaching business, okay?  And this advice comes from a former know-it-all who always felt the need to question anyone on anything or any authority.  It’s not an ego to say I’m an authority in this field.  It’s a well-supported fact so get over your own huge-ego projection.

In my line of work I deal with reactive anxious controlling drama queens all the time.  Many of them are so short-fused they lash out at me left and right.  They perceive insults as the wind blows.

They are projecting their own miserable state of mind that pushes their guys away in the first place.

They expect me to write or talk a certain way, or use certain words so they don’t get riled up.  So they expect to tell me how to coach them.

They are miserable, and it shows.

One person even quoted what I said on twitter cause she’s pissed that I told her the whole truth without sugar-coating why her guy didn’t respond to her drama queen ways (I haven’t checked and have no desire to check and I see it as a free promotion, in fact, so thank you LOL…).  It was her pushy masculine energy. Read more »


Want Your Ex Back? Keep Your Ego In Check



Your ego is why your relationship has been nothing but rocky.  Your ego needs constant validations and when it doesn’t get them, it will jump to the conclusion that you are not loved enough and “you deserve better.”  Yes you deserve a good man and a healthy fulfilling relationship and more….but you have to start from yourself first.  Be emotionally healthy first.  Be less dependent on your guy’s approval or validations.  Tame your expectations. 

“I’ve been dating my boyfriend for over 2 years. He is an amazing guy. He would do almost everything I wanted and one day all of a sudden he stopped. Multiple things were going on in his life, that I didn’t want to understand.  I only cared about me and I was not respecting his space.
He kept distance between us.  I initiated the talk over 20 times. Repeating the same thing, telling him he’ll loose me if he doesn’t step up.  Every time I break up with him he comes back the next day.  
But the last time I broke up with him he didn’t react.  He said okay which hurt me even more.  In the argument he even told me “I’m getting off you.”  Yeah he told me, the woman he once wanted to marry in the future whom he even gave a promise ring, that.

Read more »


Have A Passionate Love Affair With Yourself With These Valentine’s Specials



Time waits for no one, it’s Valentine’s Day again, folks.  Let’s see what kind of gifts you can give yourself whether or not you are with the one you love.  The number one thing you have to do to have a passionate affair with the man of your dreams is for you to have a passionate love affair with the one person most important to you first: YOURSELF.

So, here’s what you can do to start giving yourself all the love you deserve before you can give the love to anyone else:


The Journey Inward Valentine’s Day Specials 

Sign up for the ongoing Cycle 6 Journey Inward (it started on January 31) and get the following bonuses:

1. You Are The Powerful Creator of Your Reality audio (Value: $37)

2. What Being An Empty And Boundless Vessel Means audio (Value: $37)

3. How To Soften Your Boundaries So You Become Non Reactive And Irresistible (Value: $47)

4. How To Deal With Men With Issues…Or Men (Value: $37)


For ONLY $499 (Value: $657)

 btn_buynowCC_LG1 Read more »


Dating A Divorced Man: He Got Cold Feet And Broke Up With Me, How To Reverse It



When he gets cold feet do not freak out.  Never argue and try to convince a man why you are the one and why he’s doing the wrong thing for dumping you or not being sure about you.  Let him argue with himself about it.

“My story:  A journey through my shattered heart to find inner love and light…

I accidentally fell for him to be totally honest.  We worked together for many years and the story unfolded very very very slowly. 

He was handsome and tall and kind!   At first I was inspired by his achievements and his demeanor and his sophistication and his friendship.  We were definitely friends first.  We could talk endlessly about anything but what was actually happening between us. 

He was tall, visually appealing and educated.  Eventually he made my heart beat fast and I would hold my breathe whenever he was near.  I tried really hard not to let on how I felt about him.  It actually got so physically intense that sparks literally shocked us if we accidentally brushed arms.  Read more »


His Two Exes Cheated On Him, Will He Ever Trust Again?


Why are you adamant about wanting things from someone who through his words and actions have clearly told you that he can’t give you what you want.  Are you conscious that you opt for a path of most resistance?  If yes, why?  If not, now you know and can confront yourself about the folly of resisting what is.

“Hi Katarina

I came across your website a few weeks ago when I was going through a hard time and I have been hooked ever since. I think most of what you teach makes sense, actually I think I have always been somewhat leaning back naturally with men, letting them pursue me and things like that especially in the beginning of a relationship. I have purchased and read your ebook twice, and I am now thinking of signing up to one of your workshops. 

I wonder if you can give me some advice on my situation.

I ended my previous relationship a little less than two years ago because we had a lot of problems and disagreements, and I felt he didn’t appreciate me and what I did for him. After less than 2 weeks I felt I was completely over him and started enjoying my single life again and actually did not want another relationship as I felt fulfilled and the few men I dated i kept them at arms length and I felt I was happy.  Read more »


Let’s Decode A Guy’s Texting Habits….NOT!


Guys will pursue hard in the beginning so the very first thing you need to do is to keep in mind: what he does in the beginning is not a yardstick you can use throughout the relationship.  It’s like all of us will die of exhaustion if we are in the state of “falling in love” forever (imagine having sex around the clock 24/7 and can’t think of anything else but love, relationship and our lover).

If the keyword search of those who land in my very popular blog post Should I text Him? Read This Before You Shoot Another Text is of any indication this is the list of eleven typical questions text-obsessed women ask about a man’s texting habits:

1.  Why does he take hours or days to respond?  It only takes a few seconds to answer.

2.  Why does he text to check in with me but then ignore me or doesn’t respond back or disappear again or stop answering without saying anything to quit the convo?

3.  Why did he text so much in the beginning but he nows stops?

4.  Why did he text me so much before sex but nothing/much less after?

5.  Why does he stop texting good morning or good night?

6.  Why does he stop using terms of endearments in his texting such as babe, sweetheart, pumpkin, etc? Read more »


Heal Your Toxic Relationship By Healing Your Toxic Emotions


One major sign of toxicity is extreme anxiety and reactivity.  People with toxic emotions responded to most of life’s challenges with anger and aggression that leads toward depression.  Through Journey Inward they adopted a different kind of mindset and brought awareness to every movement in their mental space and create a distance between themselves and their thoughts from which they can choose their response.  It’s no longer on autopilot.


I have two most committed students who were in toxic relationships: Rinna and Arabella.  The relationships -understandably- didn’t last, they broke up with their guys.  They seek help and found me around the same time.  They were sick of suffering and they were ready to change.  They absorbed everything I had to teach without resistance. A few months later, around the same time as well, they got back with their exes totally transformed.

Here’s Rinna about her journey: “These classes are just amazing and helping me understand myself so much better. A total transformation of your self, dropping of my ego and coming back to who I really am: anxiety controlled. Read more »


Holiday Blues? Not With These Magnetizing Men Mastery Gifts To Yourself


“OMG Katarina Phang. He just told me over Microsoft communicator that he has been window shopping for an engagement ring! I am crying happy tears right now. I can’t believe it! Kat he was the most EUM I have ever met and here I sit in tears just in shock at the mention of a ring. Wow! I am leaning back. No expectations but wow! This is so life changing Kat! Thank you. I actually love you and haven’t ever met you Kat!” ~Diana, Colorado (participant of Cycle 1 Four Components Of Melting His Heart and Journey Inward, she will be my 12th engagement the past year!!!)


“I only dated my boyfriend for a month before I scared him off and he told me he wasn’t wanting to get into a relationship. I found Kat and started dating other guys for about a month and he came back chasing me… Only took a few weeks of me totally leaning back (and giving up expectations really helped me chill) for him to ask me to be his girlfriend and tell me he had fallen in love with me. We have now been together for a couple of months and it’s the best relationship of my life. I still hang out here and the girls keep me sane when I get a little anxious. Haha. For a man why didn’t want a relationship he sure talks about marriage and babies a lot! Haha xx” ~Debbie, Australia (participant of Cycle 2 Four Components Of Melting His Heart)

Is it December already?  My gosh, 2014 just passed at the blink of an eye.  What a year it has been for me though.  Since Thanksgiving 2013, I have helped giving birth to 11 (eleven) engagements and at least 2 marriages.

And dozens of women getting back with their exes.  Not to mention EUM stepping up and claiming these ladies.  Or them moving on with a new committed guy in tow.

In short, there is always good news every day in my universe.  It keeps me going with my mission. Read more »

1 2 3 4 5 7 8