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How To Deal With Depression And Anxiety Without Medication


how to deal with depression and anxiety

“Over the past two decades, the use of antidepressants has skyrocketed. One in 10 Americans now takes an antidepressant medication; among women in their 40s and 50s, the figure is one in four. Experts have offered numerous reasons. Depression is common, and economic struggles have added to our stress and anxiety.” ~A Glut of Antidepressants – The New York Times

Being in this niche has kinda accidentally granted me a mental health professional title simply because relationship brings up a lot of unresolved wounds and insecurities in anyone and a relationship coach has to deal with many emotional issues and the capacity to help clients to heal them is a prerequisite before any of them can maintain a healthy relationship.  A lot of women who come to me are ridden with anxiety, anger, and depression and thanks to those things they can’t keep their guys attracted.

They don’t know how to deal with depression and anxiety on their own or manage their own emotions and heal their wounds.

I focus on those emotional aspects and the minute they know how to shift their perspectives and deal with their own uncontrollable impulses (that are derived from dysfunctional thinking habits or thoughts), all of a sudden the dynamic of the relationship changed.

The rest is history….all of a sudden I’m one of the most sought after relationship coaches that truly has piles of success stories up my sleeve with my well-known spiritual twist to all my advice.  These women not only tell their tales of keeping their romantic love intact but also how my tools and principles also work in every aspect of their lives and teach them how to deal with depression and anxiety. Read more »


He Texts but Never Makes Plans – E-tethering Anyone?


he texts but doesn't make plans

So you met a guy, maybe on a dating site, maybe even in real life and he now has your number.  He texts, you reply, he texts, you reply.  Seems to be going well, only problem is after a few days or a week, you realize he texts but never makes plans to actually see you.  What is a girl to do?

This often happens after you have spent some time with a guy, maybe even a few dates.  You think he must be interested, after all he is still texting you, maybe even every single day.  He takes the time to text you good morning or text you goodnight.  Maybe asks how is your day.

You tell yourself, he wouldn’t be texting me if he wasn’t interested.  Maybe he even tells you he is busy or has a work or family crisis going on, so you justify why he texts but never makes plans.

What do you do when a guy texts you but never asks you out?

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When To Walk Away From A Relationship


when to walk away from relationship

When to walk away from a relationship shouldn’t be such a mystery.  I never advise women to walk away from a relationship when I know they are not over their guys unless there is abuse involved.  It’s a useless piece of advice that never works.  Instead of “walking away” because you’re feeling pissed and coming back a bit later that makes you look unstable, you should find his rivals.


Here’s a post from Jessica in the group: “Update! I broke up with emotionally unavailable man for an emotionally available guy as many of you may recall from a few weeks ago. Let me tell you how this is going….

He’s been throwing a “mantrum.”  He called me last night yelling and complaining and accusing me of cheating and many other things….

I just listened and said “believe what you want… I am not replying…” And then at some point I started to cry.  He stopped, he cried too and then he started begging and pleading for me to reconsider.  He said ” Please don’t leave me I will do anything, I will meet your kids, your family, I will take you wherever you want to go, the best restaurants, vacations – we will do it all I just want to be with you for whatever it takes.”

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How To Be A Feminine And High Value Woman Without Being A Doormat


how to be a feminine and high value woman

Being a feminine and high value woman is neither a ticking time bomb or a doormat.  A goddess knows when to stand up and put her foot down.

“I turned my man from EU to EA by leaning back. A year ago he was unsure about me and yearning after other women, which made me an anxious mess. Only when I TRULY gave up on trying to hold onto him did things change. He chased and chased and now he is devoted to me and constantly gives to me and makes me happy. I enjoy the moment with him and am not thinking long term. You can’t fake leaning back and being happy. You HAVE to do the inner work.

Katarina Phang proves it that if I can go from crazy to a goddess and high value woman, ANYONE can!!

When I first met him, he was crazy about me and I wasn’t that interested so he chased and it was just fun for me. We started seeing each other and I instantly became dependent on his attention and asked about exclusivity straight away. Read more »


Is He Stringing You Along? Or Do You Allow Yourself To Be Strung Along?


is he stringing you along

Is he stringing you along? Do you not feel like a priority in his life?  Are you constantly trying to think of ways to get his attention.  The fact is, a man can’t string you along unless you allow him to do so.  Your choice is simple.  Accept or reject his less than behavior.

Hello from Turkey!  I’m on a trip to Turkey and Greece but I want to share something with you.

Many of the women who come to me resist me on rotation dating with various reasons like “it’s just not me,”or “it’s not in my culture,” or “I can be busy with other things without dating other men,” or “I feel guilty and it just makes me feel worse and it makes me miss my emotionally unavailable man(EUM) even more/reminds me even more why I want my EUM.”  Or other reasons which, bottom line to me, are LAME. Then they ask me is he stringing me along?  Big sigh…

Is he stringing you along?  No, not really.  You are stringing yourself along by not keeping your options open.  A woman with options or a dating rotation can’t be strung along because she doesn’t focus all of her energy on just one man or hold hopes for just one outcome.

If you feel like a man is stringing you along, you are in essence, admitting you have surrendered all of you power.  You do have options.  You can say no or reject this behavior, you don’t have to be available at his command.  If you are dating others, this will begin to come naturally.

Some women do very well with the leaning back but the refusal to de-focus and spread their psychic energy caused them to relapse and get all reactive all over again.  That’s what happens when you resist me.

Here is my client Danielle’s post in the support group (get my ebook to be included in this awesome group):”Lately there’s been a lot of rotation talk – what it does and the power thereof.  If you have a rotation, you won’t be asking is he stringing me along.  You don’t have time to worry about it.

I’ve been here about 18 months and I just finally started a rotation. I always SAID I had a rotation, and I thought I technically did, but let me tell you, there’s a big difference between having men interested in you that you talk to while you hang on to the hopes of one man claiming you vs. actually getting off your ass and being feminine and going on multiple dates so you learn how to be social, how to be sweet, and how to learn to let men treat you well.
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Do His Words Keep You Addicted To Unrequited Love?


Friends - one teenage girl comforts another

If you aren’t careful and paying attention to a man’s actions, his words may have you addicted to unrequited love.  I can’t tell you how many times women will justify a man’s actions with the sentence, “but we had such an great connection.”

Below is an story from one of my clients who found out after years that she was addicted to unrequited love and that the connection she felt all those years was mostly in her head.

Several years ago, I dated a man who I felt instantly smitten with. This is unusual for me because every other time in my life the men I’ve fallen for grew on me slowly.

But not this one.

He hit me like a ton of bricks and I just KNEW he was “the one.”  He pursued me hot and heavy and even though we had opposing schedules (I worked nights and weekends, he worked weekdays) he asked me for every free moment I had. We had this connection that was just too strong to deny, and when we were together, there was no doubt in my mind he felt it too. Read more »


The Rules in Dating or My Proven Method


the rules for dating

There  is a book out called The Rules. It’s a book about the rules in dating and is about how to secure an outcome by applying a set of strict strategies.  It’s about having an agenda when you date.  Men feel this and it feels like control.  Read on then see how my method or “rules” in dating differ from this book.  

Cherry shared in the group:   “Long post, but I’ve decided to share my story, because I want women on here to know that Kat’s philosophy really does work and can transform your dating life. 

My story: 2 years ago I moved from vegas to Austin, 23 yrs old. I’d never had a serious bf (and was still a virgin) mainly because I just couldn’t get guys to want me long term. I was the Queen of chasing and convincing. 

I moved into a house with two guys, renting a room in their house. LONG story short, me and one of my roommates, I’ll call him M, ended up being very attracted to each other. I fell so hard for him. I liked him SO much. Eventually I lost my virginity to him. 

Afterwards, I got very emotionally anxious, attached, needy, possessive, clingy, etc.  Read more »


Stop Self Sabotaging Relationships and Do Your Inner Work


stop self sabotaging relationships

If you have had one relationship failure after the other, it may be time to consider the common denominator is you.  When you focus on yourself and do your inner work, you naturally stop self sabotaging relationships in your life.  


“I have had a long history of seemingly perfect relationships with Alpha men and have never quite had a problem attracting men. But for some reason, my relationships never led to a firm commitment and had often been shrouded in anger, mistrust, control and two broken engagements later, I finally realized something was not right. I needed to stop self sabotaging relationships.

I also met my current man around that time. As I watched the tone of the relationship mirror what I was used to, it suddenly hit me it was a same “skirt” different “trousers” situation.  No way was history going to repeat itself as I owned up to my part of an erratic story.

I think for me the biggies are 1) dealing with an alpha-alpha who is also an avoidant attacher 2) being a Florence nightingale and how I won my power back by snapping into reality 3) the power of completely letting go.

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Should You Tell Him How You Feel With Feeling Messages


should you tell him how you feel

I am asked all the time, should you tell him how you feel.  Many of the women that come to me have subscribed to the Rori Raye feeling messages teachings and have had men pull away after telling him how they felt.  Women that get ahead of the man in a relationship often want to control the outcome and think that telling them how they feel will inspire him to feel more.  This is rarely the case.

In my line of work I deal with reactive anxious controlling drama queens all the time.  Many of them are so short-fused they lash out at me left and right.  They perceive insults as the wind blows. What they don’t realize is that this behavior is the exact reason they don’t have much success with men.  They are so buys telling me how they feel, that they are just plain tuned out to what the man is or is NOT feeling.

They are projecting their own miserable state of mind that pushes their guys away in the first place.

They expect me to write or talk a certain way, or use certain words so they don’t get riled up.  So they expect to tell me how to coach them. They open their messages to me with words like “be gentle with me”.  They tell me they are having a rough time and can’t take a harsh reply before they even state their problems.

When a woman approaches me in this manner, I know that she responds and reacts to the men in her life the same way which is a turn off. She is asking me to manage her emotions and feeling for her, which tells me right away where her problem lies.

Women often share their feeling for that very reason.  They expect another human to manage their emotions and feeling for them.  Men feel this energy and it feels like a burden.

They are miserable, and it shows.

One person even quoted what I said on twitter cause she’s pissed that I told her the whole truth without sugar-coating why her guy didn’t respond to her drama queen ways (I haven’t checked and have no desire to check and I see it as a free promotion, in fact, so thank you LOL…).  It was her pushy masculine energy. Read more »


When You Want Your Ex Back, Keep Your Ego In Check



When you want your ex back, your ego can get in the way.  It’s your ego that gets in the way seeking the approval and validation from your ex.  If you want an ex back, you have to start with yourself first.  

“I’ve been dating my boyfriend for over 2 years. He is an amazing guy. He would do almost everything I wanted and one day all of a sudden he stopped. Multiple things were going on in his life, that I didn’t want to understand.  I only cared about me and I was not respecting his space.

He kept distance between us.  I initiated the talk over 20 times. Repeating the same thing, telling him he’ll loose me if he doesn’t step up.  Every time I break up with him he comes back the next day.  
But the last time I broke up with him he didn’t react.  He said okay which hurt me even more.  In the argument he even told me “I’m getting off you.”  Yeah he told me, the woman he once wanted to marry in the future whom he even gave a promise ring, that.

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